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Unveiling The Truth: Do Guys Really Want To Be Friends After Breakup?

If you have been through a breakup, you might have heard the question: “Can we at least be friends?” The natural response that follows this question is to investigate that do the guys really want to be friends after breakup. The answers to the questions vary depending on the situation in which you are asked to be friends after a breakup. In such a situation, you need to consider your ex’s history, motivations, ethical standpoint, and perhaps most importantly his emotional state after leaving you.

In this article, I will guide you to understand why do guys ask to be friends after a breakup, and the degree of his sincerity in doing so. Besides, the article will also help you understand the possible reasons why the guys want to be friends in a post-breakup situation.

Reasons Behind Why Guys Want To Be Friends After A Breakup

The reasons why your ex wants to be your friend after a breakup vary depending upon the particular kind of relationship that you have had with your ex. However, studies show that most of the times the reasons are quite obvious and of general nature. Here are some of the most common reasons in which your ex-partner finds motivations to pursue your friendship after a breakup.

1.   He Can’t Decide Whether To Leave You

Most of the time the guys are unable to decide whether they want you in their life or not. Some recent studies show that this inability in matters of relationship is more common in men than in women. You can understand this as one of the most possible reasons in pursuing the question: why do guys ask to be friends after a breakup if your ex-partner had this tendency of being unable to decide the future of your relationship.

2.   He Wants A Smooth Transition To A New Life

It is harder for a man to leave his partner at once. Therefore, even after deciding to leave you, he wants you in his life at least as a friend. In such a situation, the motivations might not be selfish. In other words, if your partner wants to be your friend after a breakup does not mean that he is self-centered but it is likely that he does not want you in an emotional trauma due to his sudden disappearance from your life.

3.   He Wants To Be Physical With You

Apart from the innocent reasons why do guys always want to be friends after a breakup, there might be dark motivations. After a breakup since your partner is no longer emotionally involved in you, he only wants you back in his life as a friend because he has sexual intentions for you. You can get an idea from the nature of your ex-partner to know whether he is genuinely proposing to you for friendship or he has other designs. You can analyze his relationship history with you. That is, you need to think how much he cared for you, and how much importance he gave to sexual matters.

4.   He Wants You As A Backup

If your partner is possibly engaged with someone else and still wants to be friends with you, he is likely keeping you as a backup plan. It is possible that he has a fear of losing the new partner and that is why he is keeping you as a friend in order to come back to you in such a situation. Or maybe he only wants you to support him emotionally if his new partner leaves. Still the question why does a guy want to be friends after breakup depends upon the particular kind of situation you are going through.

5.   He Wants To Uplift His Social Status

Some people think that men who are engaged with many women are cool. Your ex-partner might want you as a friend because he wants to look cool and wants to upgrade his social status using you as a tool for it. You need to understand the psychology of your ex to avoid uncomfortable friendship.

Secret Behind Why Guys Don’t Want To Be Friends After Breakup

There are guys who avoid friendship with you after you two break up. This is because he does not want any emotional drama in his life because of you. He wants to forget you at all costs. Plus, he expects something similar for you. If you find yourself in a situation where your ex does not want to befriend you, it is not because he does not care. It is possible that he is trying to forget the past, move on and plan the same for you. Staying in one’s life after a breakup does not disconnect every link with that person, and that is why it is sometimes better to stay away from each other in a post-breakup scenario.


Now in conclusion, we are faced with the most important question: “Is it better to be friends after a breakup?” There is no clear answer to this question. In the light of the reasons I discussed above, you can either say YES or No to a post-breakup friendship with your partner. If you think his motivations are innocent then you can say YES, otherwise you should say NO if the friendship harms your mental health further. 

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